I think I should go in and see her. Can I stand it. She is shaking. No doubt. I should go in. She’ll be pouring another glass. It stops the shaking. No doubt. She’ll be sitting in front of that stupid painting she likes, she’ll talk about going out to shovel the steps before it freezes, maybe she will go out, slip on the steps and kill herself, that will stop the shaking, no doubt! I should go in. I go in. I say, You are the worst thing I know I can’t breathe around you the world is more than this I am more than you put on your black coat we’re going out. We go out. We ride through the birch trees. I should tie her hands to my coat, I think, her behind me, and so I do or she would fall. We ride and yell and ride and yell and that’s the best of us anymore, that’s all we can get to anymore.

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