Larry kept his mouth shut

Terry Eagleton

  • Gallows Speeches from 18th-Century Ireland by James Kelly
    Four Courts, 288 pp, £19.65, August 2001, ISBN 1 85182 611 4

The story is told of an Irishman who appeared on Mastermind and took as his special subject modern Irish history. Who was the first female President of Ireland? he is asked. ‘Pass,’ he replies instantly. Which neighbouring island once had sovereignty over the whole country? ‘Pass,’ he responds unhesitatingly. Which crop failed in the Great Famine? ‘Pass,’ flashes back the contestant. The embarrassment in the studio is growing palpable when an Irish voice shouts out from the audience: ‘That’s right, Mick – tell the bastards nothing!’

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